Unintended consequences
by SSLE
Summary: Edith is a published journalist who lives in London and has a fancy new suitor. She feels it's time to resolve old issues but the attempt to face Sir Anthony brings unexpected results.


Parking the car outside Locksley House, Edith turned off the engine and spent some moments staring at the building. It wasn't as magnificent as Downton but it was beautiful in its own way as well. It had a quiet dignity about it, like its owner. She opened the door and stepped outside still hesitating. This hesitation annoyed her. She had changed, she wasn't afraid of facing him. She had Michael now. She was respected, she had grown up.

No, Edith decided. This wouldn't affect her. It wouldn't. She wasn't the same person she was eight months ago. And Edith prided herself of that. She was in London making a name for herself independently of her family, building a life, being happy without a husband. She wanted him to know that. Edith wanted Anthony Strallan to know what he had lost.

More than anything she wanted to see if he had recovered. If it had been easy. If it had been difficult. If he had suffered and somewhere in a dark corner of her mind she had wished he did for he deserved it.

His butler received her and not even he was able to keep the surprise off his phlegmatic expression. For several seconds he just stared at her. She gave him a small smile. "Is Sir Anthony home? I would like to see him"

"Yes…" he ended up saying "He is…he has just returned from visiting some tenants. I'm afraid he's dressing himself and will take a while"

"I don't mind to wait" Edith answered, quickly. She wanted to go past him but controlled herself. Finally, the older man stepped away and accompanied her to Sir Anthony's study.

"Sir Anthony will be here shortly, lady Edith. But I'm afraid you shall have to wait"

She gave him a small smile. "I don't mind."

"Can I bring you anything, my lady? Tea perhaps?"

"No, I'm fine." She assured him wishing he would leave her alone. When he vanished finally, Edith felt more at ease to look around. The room was just as she remembered though there were some differences. There were more books she noticed, many spread on the floor. Two or three were by the sofa. Edith picked them up to see the folded pages where he had just stopped reading. Her eyes travelled to the carelessly placed pillow which still bore the mark of the head being against it.

He has been sleeping in his library, Edith realized. Reading and sleeping she guessed he did not leave this division many times. Or was she imagining it? Was she making too much out of it? Perhaps it was just last night and she was allowing her imagination taking its toll. He was the one who left her at the altar. She wasn't supposed to care. And she didn't, Edith told herself for the hundredth time. So what if he slept in the sofa? What if he was miserable and unkempt?

Where was he now? What if he wasn't even home?

Anthony was taking too long. _Sir_ Anthony, something in her mind corrected. Edith paced from one side to the other, trying to fish for any more clues that told her about him, about his life in the previous months. Then she attempted to turn her thoughts to Michael but in this house it was difficult to think about other men.

Staying there wasn't doing anything for her. Edith had to leave. But couldn't leave without speaking to him. No, she wouldn't.

Without taking it any longer, Edith marched out the library and climbed down the stairs. Something told her he would be upstairs, maybe hiding maybe gathering courage to come to see her. She had never been on this part of the house before, Edith briefly realized. She had no idea where she was. There were rooms and more rooms. _Well, he had to be in one of them_.

Knocking at doors and opening them she kept seeing emptied rooms. Finally however, she found his bedroom. She knocked, for the first time hearing noise coming from inside. When no one answered, Edith pushed it open.

It was apparently empty. Still, she could hear someone moving, though there was no one to be seen. And so when she was looking around, faintly aware that she was inside a man's bedchamber, a door was opened behind her. Edith whirled around suddenly and nothing could have prepared her for the shock that followed.

Sir Anthony Strallan had exited a room that was obviously his bathroom. Edith only wished she would have thought of that before. Or perhaps not, a dark voice in her voice whispered-

For Sir Anthony, her former fiancée, the man who had jilted her at the altar, stood in front of her half naked. He wore black trousers but was bare from the waist up, holding a towel in his good hand.

Her lips parted but no sound came out. Anthony also froze, dead in his tracks probably not believing she was real. Her treacherous eyes roamed away from his and descended to his neck, to his preponderant adam's apple. She had seen men in similar states of undress before. She had helped in the Hospital during the war. And of course Edith would be lying if she were to say that she had never pictured in such condition.

But his broad shoulders, very broad, and his arms suppressed any kind of previous expectation. There were muscles there, not extremely defined, but still indicated that he was stronger than one would have thought. There it was, his wound, the scar that the bullet had left, no longer looking red and ugly but still there, a remainder of his actions. But truly she didn't have time to dwell upon this for his ample hairless chest was pale, milky and for an insane moment Edith indulged in thoughts of how soft his chest would feel against her hands.

There was water dripping from his blonde hair. And again, his hair was also an unrecognizable feature to her as well. It wasn't impeccably pulled back as she was used to remember. On the contrary, it was wet and messy, spiking in all directions.

"Lady Edith!" After an eternity he seemed to recover partially from his shock "What are you doing here?!"

"I…" to all fairness, she really wanted to speak. Only words failed her. Anthony however made no attempts to cover himself with the towel. He strode over to the bed and put his robe around his body.

He closed his eyes momentarily, sighing. "What are you doing here?" Anthony wondered while she fought the blush.

Why was this affecting her? She was a writer, she was a Londoner now she was…but these thoughts failed her again when her eyes met his. "I wanted to speak to you"

He looked around, nervously "I don't think you should talk to me in my bedroom"

"Why not?" Suddenly, she adopted a defiantly attitude, a means of defense they both knew.

Anthony frowned. Only by that, she noticed how thin he truly was, especially in the face, how haggard he looked like. "It is not proper. Your reputation…"

"There is no one here" She stated "Apart from us, I mean"

He fastened the robe tighter around his body. She wouldn't give up "I'm sorry I kept you waiting"

Edith almost smiled at that. He was still kind and polite even after she had barged into his most private rooms and caught him in such a compromising situation. "I should have been more patient" She conceded, a warm spreading through her chest. Every feeling of resentment and hatred she had felt towards him had slowly vanished, erased from her mind and body. Edith could never hate him, never.

This musings led her to silence.

Anthony stared at his naked feet. "And so…you wish to speak to me?"

"I did" Edith uttered quietly "But for the life of me, I cannot say it"

"Pardon me?"

She smiled depreciatively "I came here to gloat really. I wanted to tell you that I was happy…that you got what you wanted…and I was hoping that you were miserable and I would be happy and I would gloat…and make you feel bad" The words were said very quickly, as if she was ashamed of them.

Anthony looked even more downcast than before but still he muttered "It is your right"

"No" Edith took a step towards him "It is not. You did wrong…terribly wrong. And you hurt me. And I wanted to hurt you but…" She snorted "but you were well intentioned"

"Some say that Hell is full of well meaning people" The bitterness in his voice surprised her.

"Do you regret it?" She wondered softly. All of the sudden, she had become the same young woman who had smiled when he whispered she had given him his life back.

"You are happy now" Anthony murmured. "I could not regret that"

"I could have been happy with you"

"Hardly" There it was the quiet self loathing tone.

She took another step towards him "Don't. Don't do it again."

"You are happy" he stated again "And I could not regret that one of my decisions made you happy. However" She looked up at him "I lost you." Anthony whispered. "And…well."

He let his words hung in the air. "Forgive me" Anthony stepped away. "You are a journalist I gather. I read your articles with great interest. They are…very you. I could almost your voice stating them. I was very happy for you" He smiled goofily at her. No one had told her so in such terms. People had always believed that this was the new Edith, the new woman who wrote in the papers, that she had changed. But Anthony…Anthony didn't of course. Anthony knew she was always like this…

He knew. He knew _her._

"Thank you" She said, overwhelmed with emotion.

"And…" He hesitated, taking a sharp breath "You have a…new suitor…" Anthony again diverted his eyes from her. "I heard something in the village. People talk" He gave her an apologetically smile.

"It's not quite a suitor" And there it was. She sounded as though she was trying to excuse herself.

"It's alright, lady Edith. You are a young writer living in London…it is only natural"

His tone was calm and appeasing but it was fake she saw. His hand was behind his back and she could guess he was clasping it. Edith felt again giddy. He was jealous. He was actually jealous! And trying hard to hide it. "And in the end it's fitting" Anthony added "I'm…paying my dues"

"What do you mean?" She asked frowning.

He shook his head. "Nothing"

Edith sighed and decided to place her hand on his arm with a certainty she didn't possess. "What do you mean, Anthony?"

He took a deep breath again and looked resigned. "I hurt you. I know I did. I still believe I did the right thing but I've had much time to think and I reached the conclusion I shouldn't have done it in the way I did. It was an awful humiliation for you. And I deserve…I deserve your hatred."

Her fingers tightened her grip around his arm. "I don't hate you" Edith whispered softly. He stared intensely at her as though he didn't believe. "You did humiliate me…and I did want to gloat. But now that I've seen you, I have realized that I don't hate you…that I can't."

Anthony stood in astounded silent. "And perhaps…well, perhaps you were right. Not in the way you did it" She added quickly "But in the point of the matter"

When he realized what she meant Anthony stepped away from her. "I see"

"What I mean is that…I wasn't ready to marry. I was going to marry you for the wrong reasons"

"Of course" Anthony muttered and she got the feeling he was not understanding her meaning.

"I don't mean to hurt you, I'm just saying that it was all very rushed…I wanted to be like my sister's…I didn't want to stay behind"

He nodded and smiled kindly at her "I understand. I understand that very well, really. It is normal…"

"I didn't use you" She suddenly blurted.

"I know" Anthony reassured "I know you didn't Lady Edith. It would have been a mistake. The only difference is that now we both know so"

Edith's gaze bored into his and he held it bravely. But he wasn't able to keep his emotions from his face. There was sadness and fear and frustration. "I think I should ask you to go, lady Edith. I'm not feeling very well" Anthony muttered, diverting his eyes, bowing his head.

A warm spread through her chest and against all reason she stepped closer to him. And slowly, she brought her hand to his cheek, making him look at her. Anthony swallowed. Her gaze travelled south, to his chest now covered by the robe. When they met again, Edith saw it all. He loved her. _He loves me still._

"You still love me" It was a statement not a question.

Anthony desperately wanted to back off but his legs didn't obey his brain. She is waiting for an answer, he realized. _She is waiting for an actual answer, an answer I couldn't possibly…_

"I said always" He whispered.

"You said God should bless me always" Edith softly countered

His snort resembled a bitter chuckle. "Oh sorry, my lady. I meant that I would love you, always"

Her lips became a thin line, her mind immersed in a great internal battle, battling with feelings. And when she realized her hand had found a way onto his wet hair and brought his face closer, bringing his lips to hers.

Anthony didn't resist. Couldn't resist. His viable hand pulled her closer and deepened the kiss. It was their first kiss. Oh and the irony of it undid her as she moaned against his lips, when his tongue ran through her lower lip. Edith's hands moved to his chest and she surprised him when her hands unlaced the belt of his robe. Stop her, a voice in his mind yelled but his hand was too busy stroking the skin of her neck.

His robe fell to the floor and he was again half naked. Edith's bold hands finally felt the skin of his chest as she had so dearly wished before. The muscles were firmer than she thought and he was thinner than she had imagined.

Anthony broke the kiss abruptly. "I'm sorry, but I cannot…" He struggled "You cannot be here in my bedchamber, with me…when I'm in this state"

"Why not?" Edith muttered, blushing deeply.

"You know why" He interrupted softly.

"In London…" She attempted. "In London, there would be no problem"

He rolled his eyes. "Oh dear God, we are not in London. I'm certainly not. And then…what would happen afterwards?" Anthony went on to pick up his robe. "I left you at the altar. You moved on…and now you are happy, you have a job that you love and that obviously fulfills you and there's this young man…"

"He's not you." She blurted out suddenly, taking his hand, his wrecked arm. "He's…dangerous and exciting and he's very full of himself…he's different. Very different from Downton and everything I knew here. But he's not you"

Anthony sighed. "You can't possibly do this. You can't possibly be thinking this again. This is all because of the kiss and how you…saw me just now. You must go"

"Anthony please…hear me out. You have shunned me and ignored my opinion. You preferred to heed to my father and my grandmother's view. And that made us both miserable. Please"

The older man took a deep breath and for a moment looked ready to either kiss her or scream at her. However, when he spoke his tone was calm and poignant. "I will hear you, very well. But not now. Not today. You'll go home today. And you will truly think about what you want to say…what you want to tell me. And tomorrow…if you decision still stands I will receive you…we'll drink tea and we'll talk." He looked down at himself "And hopefully I'll be dressed"

Edith stifled a giggle. "That is fair, I suppose" Their gazes met "But I will be here tomorrow"

Anthony smiled a little at her. Before leaving, however, Edith tiptoed and placed her lips against his. For a couple of seconds he closed his eyes. "I will be here tomorrow"

* * *

When she entered his library the following day he had been by the window, obviously watching her, if she was coming or not. When Edith was introduced inside the room they merely stared at each other.

Anthony clasped his fist, preventing himself from trembling.

"I love you" She muttered simply. "I know it's hard…I know you…did all that…all you did…and I wasn't right as well. But I love you. I know that now. I didn't know that before, but I…I know…"

He sighed deeply and crossed the room, his hand on her cheek pulling her towards him. Edith thought he would kiss her, but he stopped inches away from her lips. "You are rambling" Anthony whispered before pressing his lips against hers.

"That is your thing indeed" She muttered when they broke apart again and went for another kiss.

* * *

**Yes, this is just really fluff. **

**And an chance to write a shirtless Anthony. **


End file.
